important dates 2018

destination: laos [2 - 4 march 2017]

Day 1 (2 March 2017)

seriously, this will be the shortest entry of my travel log for i forgot most of details! so sorry, huhu.. our flight was airasia as usual, departed from KLIA2 on 6.40am and arrived at laos on 8.20am. we already made a tour arrangement earlier through tripadvisor. our guide, chansay picked us up from the airport and immediately started the tour.

our first stop was wat ho phra keo and wat si saket. the word wat actually means temple. these two temples are located opposite to each other. chansay explained the history of these two wat to us along the tour. there were a lot of tourists walking around. after the temples visit, we went to patuxai (gate of victory). along the way, we passed the presidential palace. we stopped a while to take a few photos.

wat ho phra keo is no longer used for religious purposes and is now turned into a museum. it was originally constructed in 1565 as the lao royal family's personal chapel and as a home for the emerald buddha. but in 1779, vientiane was seized by the siamese general and the emerald buddha was taken to siam and the wat ho phra keo was destroy. the emerald buddha now resides in wat phra kaew, bangkok.

wat si saket may be the oldest temple still standing in vientiane. it was built in 1818 with siamese style of buddhist architecture. wat si saket features a cloister wall with more than 2,000 ceramic and silver buddha images.

the presidential palace is the official residence of the president of laos. it was designed by local architect and first started in 1973. it finally opened in 1986 but closed to public. it is surrounded by well-manicured lawns and gardens.

patuxai (victory gate) was built between 1957 and 1968. it is a war monument dedicated to those who fought in the struggle independence from france. it resembles the arc de triomphes in paris. our next stops are pha that luang and cope visitor center.

pha that luang is a gold-covered large buddhist stupa and was originally bulit as hindu temple. it was later built as a khmer temple but fell into ruin. in 1566, the temple was rebuilt. the bases had a length of 69 meters each and was 45 meters high. it was surrounded by 30 small stupas.

before checking in to our hotel, we stopped by hard rock cafe for i wanted to buy the hard rock bear for my collection. we freshened up for while and continue our tour to buddha park. once done, we visited the mekong night market and bought some souvenirs there. our hotel was just a walking distance from the market. before going back to the hotel we had our dinner. the next day (this was not initially planned, but chansay suggested it to us), we will have a long journey to vang vieng.

Day 2 (3 march 2017)

on our second day, we journeyed 157km from vientiane to vang vieng. this trip wasn't originally in our itinerary. it was added later when chansay suggested it and we were very glad for the change for we had a lot of fun in vang vieng! the journey took almost four hours. we started early in the morning, around 6:30am. we bought our breakfast along the way (just some buns and coffee). our first stop in vang vieng was thang chang/jang cave. we took a long flight of stairs to get into the cave. it was filled with wondrous stalactites and staglamites. the view from above is also breathtaking.

after the thang chang/jang visit, we had lunch at a local halal restaurant that offers indian cuisine. done with lunch, we continued our adventure by ziplining and tubing at tham nam (water cave). here, we got lucky! there are two start points, A and B. Start point A ends at the blue lagoon and start point B ends at thang nam. Route B is shorter than Route B. but we managed to start from start point A and finished at thang nam (slightly longer than original route B). the reason was, there was a large group of peoples using route A and to avoid the 'traffic', we were given an alternative route since there are the only two of us. done with zipling, we went tubing into the water cave. our adventures in vang vieng didn't stop there. we went kayaking at nam song river.

by the time we finished kayaking, the sun had already began to set. we journeyed back to our hotel in vientaine and stopped for dinner along the way. we mostly slept all the way back and arrived at our hotel around 11pm. once back, we packed our stuffs to go back to malaysia the next day.

Day 3 (4 march 2017)

we checked out on 7.30am. chansay and the driver drove us to the airport. we said our goodbyes there. overall, i'm very satisfied with this holiday in laos for we did a lot of outdoor activities that we rarely did; ziplining, tubing and kayaking. i really recommend laos for your vacation. our flight departed as schedule and we arrived at malaysia safely.

ps: the next travel entry are in hong kong and macau! stay tuned.. v(~_^)v

I’ve had a dream...😂

[SONG] Exile ~ My Star

Kagayaki wo ushinau hoshi ga aru nara
Sore wa anata wo ushinatta jibun
If there is a star losing its radiance
It is you who lost yourself

"Aisuru koto wa mamorinuku koto"
Kotoba de iu no wa tayasui keredo...
"To love is to protect"
Although it is easy to say in words ...

Ano hi ano basho kara hajimatta sutourii
Kanashimi mo koete kyou made kita kara
A story that started from that place that day
I have gone beyond sorrow and to this day

Futari wa ano sora no hoshi no you ni
Yorisoi kagayaite
Towa no ai wo chikau
We are like the stars in the sky
Shining closely
I swear the love of the universe

Oogesa na shiawase ja nakute ii
Sasayaka na kizuna wo
Ai de tsunaide yuku
Yume no tsuzuki wo mite iyou
Happiness doesn't need to be exaggerated
A modest bond
Connect with love
Let's see the continuation of our dreams

Tooi mukashi ni hanatareta hikari
Hateshinai toki koete todoku you ni
Light emitted long ago
To reach beyond infinity

Atatakai yasashisa wo wakeai nagara
Ishiki wo koete tamashii wo iyasu
Sharing a gentle warmth
Heals the soul beyond consciousness

Futari wa ano sora no tsuki no you ni
Michikake wo kurikaeshi
Ai wo sodatete yuku
We are like the moon in that sky
Burning repeatedly
To raise love

Konomama eien ni kawaranai
Futari de ireru you ni
Zutto sunao na kimochi de iremasu you ni to negau
This way it will not change forever
Like to be alone
I hope that you will be able to keep feeling honestly

Aishiai motomeru koto de
Kizutsukeai yurushiau koto
By asking for love
To hurt and forgive

Cuz you're my star
Ano sora no hoshi no you ni
Donna toki mo boku wo terashi tsuzukete hoshii
Cuz you're my star
Like that star in the sky
I want you to continue shining at me anytime

I'll be your star
Ano sora no hoshi no you ni
Boku mo kimi wo terasu
Sonna hikari ni natte
Shiawase wo hirogete yukou
I'll be your star
Like that star in the sky
I will also shine on you
Being such light
Let's spread happiness

I promise you
To share my life
Just stay with me
You are all I need
Cuz you are my star

Terashi tsuzukete hoshii...
Cuz you're my star...
I want you to continue shining ...
Cuz you're my star ...

I promise you
To share my life
Just stay with me
You are all I need
Cuz you are my star

Sonna hikari ni natte
Shiawase wo hirogete yukou
Being such light
Let's spread happiness

ps: i got the romaji lyric from snakie's obsession site and the translations are translated directly by google translate, hence the awkwardness...

[BOOK] Malaysia Membaca (Part I - Children Book)

'Malaysia Membaca' or simply translated as 'Malaysia Reads' is a challenge initiated by Malaysia's education minister, Dr Maszlee Malik to encourage reading. A survey by the National Library of Malaysia in 1996 and 2005 showed Malaysians only read two books a year on average. so, Maszlee urged malaysians to share their ten favourite books with the hashtag #malaysiamembaca. he started the challenge by sharing his own ten favourite books. i intended to take this challenge when it was first introduced on 6th august this year. but, knowing my procrastination habit, i just found the time to post it now.

it's hard for me to list just ten books because i'm proud to admit that i'm kind of a bookworm. both of my parents were teachers. so, they encouraged my siblings and i to read at an early age. they would never hesitated to buy us reading materials; magazines. books and even comics. for us, reading is an enjoyable past time. our parents never forced us to read, but instead they showed us. they read, we followed. our father especially loved to read us stories. we are privileged to have our own mini library.

the age gap between me and my closest sister is five years. so, i used to bug her and my other siblings to read me books. they could only tolerate me for sometimes and later told me to 'buzz off' and learned reading myself. they took the time to teach me and later on, i could read. i still bother them by reading out loud at first. you knew, as children, we loved to read aloud at first because we were so proud that we could read on our own, haha.. i finally learned to read quietly and gave my siblings a peace of their time. so, for the first part of my #malaysiamembaca entry, i would love to share my ten favourite children books. some of these books, i read when i am already an adult.

1. Mr Pink-Whistle by Enid Blyton

Mr Pink-Whistle is half-human, half-brownie, and can make himself invisible. he's always helping people in trouble and getting himself into all sorts of funny situations. he uses this magic trick alongside his ability to communicate with animals to right all the wrong things he comes across. once, he uses his power of invisibility to go into a young boy’s room and scare him because the boy is a bully.

2. Malory Towers by Enid Blyton

Malory Towers is a series of six novels by English children's author Enid Blyton. The series is based on the girls' boarding school Benenden School that Blyton's daughter attended, and that relocated during the war to the Cornish seaside. The series follows the protagonist, Darrell Rivers on her adventures and experiences in boarding school. In 2009, six more books were added to the series by author Pamela Cox. Events in these take place after Darrell has left the school and focuses on her younger sister, Felicity Rivers (Wikipedia, 2018). these books actually helped me a lot on coping with boarding school. at least i knew what to expect.

3. The Famous Five - Enid Blyton

to be honest, i first read the malay version of these book (our mini library had the whole collection) and it was known as 'lima sekawan.' only later, i read the original english version. the novels feature the adventures of a group of young children – Julian, Dick, Anne and Georgina (George) – and their dog Timmy. in the malay version, they are known as eddie, dean, mona, george and tompok (spots) the dog. the stories take place in the children's school holidays after they have returned from their respective boarding schools. each time they meet they get caught up in an adventure, often involving criminals or lost treasure.

4. Five Find-Outers by Enid Blyton

again, i first read the malay version known as 'lima penyiasat.' these books i borrowed from my primary school's library. only recently, i managed to buy the original english series. this is a series of children's mystery books set in the fictitious village of Peterswood based on Bourne End, close to Marlow, Buckinghamshire, the children Larry (Laurence Daykin), Fatty (Frederick Trotteville), Pip (Philip Hilton), Daisy (Margaret Daykin), Bets (Elizabeth Hilton) and Buster, Fatty's dog, encounter a mystery almost every school holiday, always solving the puzzle before Mr Goon, the unpleasant village policeman, much to his annoyance. in malay version, they are known as Gemuk, John, Samy, Mary and Seroja. Buster is still Buster.

5. Chronicles of Narnia - C.S. Lewis

to be fair, i watched the movie first before reading the books. so, i read these while i'm already an adult. Set in the fictional realm of Narnia, a fantasy world of magic, mythical beasts, and talking animals, the series narrates the adventures of various children who play central roles in the unfolding history of that world. Except in The Horse and His Boy, the protagonists are all children from the real world, magically transported to Narnia, where they are called upon by the lion Aslan to protect Narnia from evil and restore the throne to its rightful line. The books span the entire history of Narnia, from its creation in The Magician's Nephew to its eventual destruction in The Last Battle (Wikipedia, 2018).

6. The Underland Chronicles - Suzanne Collins

author, suzanne collins is famous with her hunger games trilogy. few people knew she also wrote the underland chronicles for children.  It tells the story of a boy named Gregor and his adventures in the "Underland", a subterranean world located under New York City. The Underland is inhabited by humans who traveled below hundreds of years ago, along with various giant versions of creatures like bats, cockroaches, and rats.

7. Fairy Tales - Hans Christian Andersen

life as a child would be incomplete without the famous fairy tales. Hans Christian Andersen was a Danish author. Andersen's fairy tales, of which no fewer than 3381 works have been translated into more than 125 languages, have become culturally embedded in the West's collective consciousness, readily accessible to children, but presenting lessons of virtue and resilience in the face of adversity for mature readers as well. Some of his most famous fairy tales include "The Emperor's New Clothes", "The Little Mermaid", "The Nightingale", "The Snow Queen", "The Ugly Duckling", "The Little Match Girl", "Thumbelina", and many others (Wikipedia, 2018).

8. Mother Goose's Rhymes

Mother Goose is often cited as the author of hundreds of children’s stories that have been passed down through oral tradition and published over centuries. Various chants, songs, and even games have been attributed to her, but she is most recognized for her nursery rhymes, which have been familiar with readers of all generations (Poetry Foundation). i often sing her nursery rhymes even until now!

9. Dr Seuss' Books

i became obsessed with dr seuss' works after watching the movie, the lorax.  from then, i tried to read as many books written by him. His work includes many of the most popular children's books of all time, selling over 600 million copies and being translated into more than 20 languages by the time of his death (Wikipedia, 2018). please visit Official site of Dr. Seuss and the Cat in the Hat featuring games, printable activities, the complete illustrated character guide and much more.

10. Kumpulan Cerita Rakyat Malaysia published by Dewan Bahasa dan Pustaka

these are the local malaysian's folklore. i keep rereading these books from time to time. my malaysian's culture is full with our own tales. some of the famous ones are puteri gunung ledang, hikayat mahsuri, lembing awang pulang ke dayang, pak kaduk, sang gedembai, hang tuah and si tanggang. i vow to myself that i will read these stories to my own children in order for them to remember their roots even when they are more familiar with the western folktales. the question is when will i finally have my own children? LOL..

#malaysiamembaca will be continued...

welcoming 1440 Hijri

.Indeed, Allah will not change the condition of a people until they change what is in themselves (13:11)

alhamdulillah, another new year in the islamic calendar. i'm grateful for the life Allah has granted me until now. i've accepted Allah as my Lord, and Islam as my way of life, and Muhammad (SAW) as prophet and messenger of Allah. please refer back to my previous entry; ahlan wa sahlan, ya 1434H to learn more on hijrah and for the du'a for the ending and starting of hijri year as well. last but not least, please enjoy this song from maher zain.

bipolar: you might think you finally got the hang of it...

well.. well.. guess what? a few of my entries from before were written in my manic episode. i think you might guess which ones. the thing about bipolar (for me) is it's easy to sense your depression but hard to sense your mania. during my latest manic episode end of last year, i was 100% certain that i wasn't manic eventhough there were few obvious signs; believing to be in relationship with one of the A-list hollywood actor (*loki* cough..), full of energy (need less/no sleep) and head full of ideas (some of them are outrageous). the main reason i keep insisting i wasn't manic was that i couldn't finish my university's assignments, haha.. i always thought when i'm manic, i'll be able to write those assignments in the blink of an eye, i was deadly wrong though! and it lead me to repeating those subjects again and there goes my dream to finish my study within the original time frame given.

but this manic episode is less severe than the couple of them before. i think i only hurt a few people but the few people are those that mean most to me, my family. and to add to that, my family was now more familiar with my condition that they knew how to handle it. they put me into the care of the professionals a.k.a i was hospitalized for about two to three weeks. it wasn't a pretty picture for me though. i was feeling betrayed. how could my family, the one i trusted the most keep me lock in a 'crazy hospital' i cried every single day i was there. my family never miss to visit (they took turn, sometimes my parents came, sometimes my siblings, uncles, aunts, cousins and from here you could notice how lucky i am to have these people that i consider my support systems) me every single day. still, i hate them. even miss A visited me (thank Allah for a great friend).

and again, my faith in Allah was also tested. many questions popped in my mind. why me? why Allah put me in this condition? why am i even alive? is it better for me to be dead? the suicidal thought is common and i keep contemplating the best way to end my life. i imagined shooting my head from all angles (front, back, sides, influenced by movies), cutting my wrist, jumping off the bridge, drowning myself in a bath tub (another influence from the movie) and overdosing on medication (the only method that i honestly believe i could proceed with). during my hospitalization, i made a few friends. they were in before me, so they got out before me. i became extremely closed with miss N. she was suffering from schizophrenia. we did a lot of activity together; colouring, planning our future (which is quite outrageous now when i'm 'sane'), singing and even causing troubles for the nurses. she got discharged before me and still keep in touch for a short time.

the reason for us to stop keeping in touch was because miss N refused to accept her condition. she didn't continue with her appointments with the doctor and this lead to her to cease taking her medication altogether. when i tried to advise her, she rejected me. miss N believed she is pregnant with septuplets. i believed her when we were together in the hospital. but once i got better, i knew that she wasn't and later told her that it was just her imagination. i still follow her on facebook and she still believe her phantom pregnancy. during my conversation with her in the hospital, she told me that she was all alone. nobody came to visit her. i think this is why it is hard for her to accept her condition. i have a strong support system to help me through this hardship where as she got none.

i had several minor depressions after my mania. it was hard to get back into a normal life. there were a lot of changes after i got discharged. the workplace especially. one of the causes for my mania is my workplace's atmosphere. i got in an major disagreement with my superior. i still didn't like him until now, haha.. when i came back to work, one of my closed colleague got transferred and there were a couple of new faces. truth be told, i don't like my workplace until now. i don't know where i fit in. i felt like one of those misplaced jigsaw puzzle piece. i always felt left out even when i try my best to go along with everyone and everything. it just wasn't me, i felt fake. i'm planning to go back to putrajaya soon. at least there, i could easily hangout with my closed friends. if i am to go back to putrajaya, the only thing i would miss is living with my parents.

ps: the point of this entry is as the aforementioned topic/subject.. i think i would recognize and familiar with bipolar, but i didn't. even with medication, even with strong support system, even when you are stable for quite some time, it could always lurking back into your life when you least expected it... and again it is also hard to explain the situation to people who lack awareness on mental health problems.

sayangi malaysiaku!

happy 61st independence day, malaysia!!! proud to be malaysian!! every year, we (segamat immigration office's staffs) have to take part in the district parade. i've been doing this for three years now, from 2016 - 2018. we only marched in 2017. in 2016 and 2018 we just have to stand directly at segamat square waiting for the other marching contingents to arrive.

in front of the office before the event

waiting for the others to arrive

could you spot me?

ps: my friend and i went straight to the movie after the event! we watched munafiq 2.. :)

bad at keeping in touch, but...

i'm ashamed to admit that i'm pretty bad at keeping in touch with well almost anyone!!! but that doesn't mean i forgot about everyone. i always remember the important people in my life; parents, family and close friends. i do feel guilty from time to time. but i always trying my best keeping up with them by following them on social media and this may lead you to believe that i'm a stalker. yup, i'm quite a stalker. but believe me, i stalk because i'm truly interested in knowing about their life! great, now i sound like a 'busybody' person, huhu... i'm sometimes that person but as i grew older and wiser (hopefully), i try my best to keep out of other people business. just kept to myself and the few people that really matters. last july, miss a and me visited awed in kedah. we try our best to get together at least once a year. so, here are some of the pictures.

at sultan abdul halim airport before our departure back to putrajaya

favourite food stop, nasi daging perlis (just look at my double chin, huhu..)

muzium padi kedah

ps: i love you guys to the moon and back!!! thank you for being such a great friends!! XOXOXO

[SONG] Alif Satar & Siti Nordiana ~ Sebenarnya

[SONG] Maroon 5 ft Julia Michaels ~ Help Me Out

happy birthday to me!!!

alhamdulilah, Allah gives me another year to live on this earth. i celebrated my birthday by getting annoyed at KLIA2's myNEWS.com. after coming back from our trip to hong kong and macau, i suddenly wanted to drink milk so much. it was 15 minutes past 12 and the only store that was opened is myNEWS.com. i took a 500ml goodday fresh milk and the price tag is RM5.70. but when i paid, the price hiked to RM7.10. i told the worker, and he rudely told me he couldn't do anything about it. i already reported this to myNEWS.com and eAduan KPDNKK.

spot the diffrent!

but later that day was all sunshine and rainbow for me. first, i celebrated my birthday with aisyah, rafiz and ateng and sushi zanmai, d'pulze, putrajaya. this is the first time, i ate ate sushi zanmai and i was really interested in the way it send your order. there is a track where this cute 'train' with your order on top that send your order. it will stop at the table and asking you to take you food. once done. you have to press this blinking button for it to go back to its starting point. btw, these beautiful meals were paid by the evergenerous, mr. rafiz.

salmon maki and salmon nigiri

salmon temaki (yup, i do love salmon)

after that, i went straight to restoran ana ikan bakar petai bangi to celebrate my birthday with family this time. both the company and the food are great! we ate almost everything from seafood to chicken and beef! they sang the birthday song for me and and my sister-in-law, kak ani who celebrated her birthday on the 25th. as usual, the little ones, alif but not syariq since he had a cough blew the candle. syariq really pulled a long face for not be able to blow the candles.

mak su is me and mak long is kak ani

i'm grateful for having a very tight and closed-knit family. no matter how 'crazy' i go, they will always stick by me!

the oreo cream and cookies cake was chosen by syariq

this birthday might be the best and biggest celebration ever! i received a lot of wishes and gifts. i quote back what i said at FB, 'As vain as it sound, those wishes made me feel special, important, appreciated and needed. These feelings are the reason that keep me on going in this life. Once again, thousand of thank you and may Allah bless all of you.❤️  '

from fiza and yati

from kak ala's bunch

from officemates

from (clockwise): abg ijan's bunch, abg ain's bunch, ateng (nice packing. at first i thought he gave me a secret medicine to help with my bipolar since he is a pharmacist, haha..) and the HRC honolulu bear from aisyah and rafiz

ps: i went to a trip to hong kong and macau on 25 - 28 january 2018 with dear aisyah as usual. maybe, i write on this trip first, not laos while it still fresh in my mind, huhu...