don't be a man man seeker

salam.. wow, this is my 100th entry and i will comment upon this article i read online at iluvislam.com.  actually i noticed this from my facebook wall and i find that it very interesting! if you click the link, you could read the full article and the article is in malay. if you understand malay than you can understand the article. but if not, do what i always do when i came upon any articles in foreign language that i don't undesrstand by using the google translator. yes, i know that sometimes the translations are not 100% correct but you still could grab the overall concept.

as you can see from the picture above, there's a 'perigi' which is a well that is chasing a 'timba' which is a bucket or pail, and the dialogue in the well's bubble simply means, 'paaiiilll... i love you! muaahh!' and as for the pail, the meaning is the same, hehe.. in the old days, we didn't have the luxury of modern piping, hence the well. usually it's the pail that is being brought to the well not the other way around. no one would bring the well to the pail because it's simply impossible and if it could be done, it's impractical! so, the article argues that in truth, there's no such thing as pail/bucket seeking well in the first place!

pail/bucket and well are two non-living items. they couldn't move by themselves. the pail is brought to the well because there's a will that needs/wants water by a person. so, the will of the person actually brought the two items together. and we are very familiar with the saying, 'when there is a will, there will always be a way!' when a person either male or female loves another, he or she will have the right to make the first move either by proposing or expressing feelings. i think, in earlier days the scenario of women seeking men is viewed as inappropriate to both the eastern and western cultures.

in these modern days, people are coming to accept the fact of woman making the first move. actually, this method is acccepted long ago when Saidatina Khadijah(ra) made the move to propose to Prophet Muhammad (saw) by using a middle person. in Islam, it is fine for the woman to express her need to marry a man as long as it is done according to syara'.

okay, now it's the time for my personal view about this topic. i have nothing against women making the first move it as long as the women don't seem so desperate, not overdoing it and know when to stop. for me knowing to stop is one of the important. you don't want to be labelled as a stalker. by agreeing to it, doesn't mean that i can be one (making the first move). it's easier said and done. when i really do have feeling for a guy, i couldn't express my feeling to him. here's an example.. i can 'shamelessly' ask my male friends (no special feeling) to marry me because i have no intention of marrying him, hehe.. i was just joking around. i am known for my rarely serious attitude amongst my family and friends. so, the other party will never take me serisously. so, if i do have the courage to ask the man that i really like, he will mostly thougt that i was joking! huhu, poor me.. really need to take things more seriously!!!

the next thing is, most of the guys i like, (wow, it sounds like i've got many!!! in reality i only have a few. crush, maybe a lot! but more than crush is like less than 5 in my 29 years of living!) are within my friend's circle, usually closed friends and i don't have many guys closed friends. there will be a few possible outcomes if i choose to express my feeling to the one i like:

1. he accepted me and we live happily ever after till death do us apart
2. he rejected me and we continue our friendship as before
3. he rejected me and cease friendship because the awkwardness and we both move on our seperate ways
4. etc.. etc.. etc..

so, i could only think the three possible outcomes. if (1) and (2), i will not regret me making the first move but if (3) then i will regret it my whole life because i lost a precious friendships. so, what would YOU do in this situation. some books or magazines adviced us, the woman to make the first move but at the same time be subtle so that the man will think that he is the one making the first move. eventhough they give a lot of suggestions, still i didn't have the courage to do or maybe i have did try a few but it didn't work! so that's all for my 100th entry. hope you like it and perhaps relate to it!

i wish i could do this NOW! oh, i could HERE!
'dear mr 'i hope u know u r', will you do me the honor of becoming my husband?'